This past Saturday I played at a funeral of a close family friend. I've only played at a few funerals in my life but they are one of the hardest settings a worship leader will ever have to play in. Right in the midst of tragedy and despair, the question always comes up: what am I supposed to sing?

Picking a song can be a nerve-wracking experience. You want to pick a song that will honor the deceased and the family. Should you even play a worship song? Should it be a song the family chooses? What if they leave the selection up to you? There are a lot of questions in the planning process.

Here are 3 things worship leaders should remember when playing at a funeral:

1️⃣ The service is for the family and friends

Ultimately, a funeral is meant to provide comfort and healing for the people there. If you have the choice between picking a "tribute" song and a song of comfort, pick the latter unless otherwise suggested. Sometimes those are one in the same - use your best judgement in the situation.

2️⃣ Pick a song that matches the tone of the service

The most important thing to remember is to pick a song that matches the tone of the service. Some funerals are celebrations of life. They celebrate all of the amazing things the person has done in their life. In this case, it can be appropriate to pick an upbeat song. Some funerals are memorials. They hold a much more somber tone - an upbeat song will clearly be out of place in this environment.

Get as much clarification on the tone of the service as you can before you pick your song.

3️⃣ Funerals are one of the only times the unchurched will come to church

Funerals bring people who have given up on church or who have never been to a church. The unchurched may never come to church for any reason except for a funeral. Use this opportunity to clearly present the gospel in the song you choose. Don't back away from a worship song because some of the people there don't believe in God. There is no better time to share about the love of God than in the midst of heartache.

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